normally I beat off every night before I go to bed even though my little brother sleeps in the same room. So I was starting to last night, and he jumped out of bed and said "Fuck, Im not listening to this shit again" We havent talked since. fuck me
i was so drunk he made me beileve the song was called "thanksgiving sex."
Currently standing on top of my parents leather couch with no pants on playing helicoptor with my penis. You?
My vagina has officially become a vortex for sexually confused frat guys.
So they discontinued the hummer... Now people will have to go door to door to let others know they're assholes
you blew your rape whistle in his face every time he got near a girl till he left the party...
I'm going to die alone in a sea of empty vodka bottles and cats.
I got mine. It's a truly beautiful penis. Plus he pulled his tongue muscle on my vagina.
Its official. I've reentered slutty territory. I was a condom away from having sex in a childs playhouse at a park. Oh and I lost my car keys.
what the fuck is a social media consultant, who does she consult for, and how bad is she at it? her facebook account is currently hacked and posting ads for the ipad 2 on my newsfeed
This is the most scared i've been of my hands since i did shrooms.
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
He taught me where the gears in a five speed are with his penis.
Whatever. I just want to indulge in this mcchicken and forget all about his tiny penis.
I'm SO high. And there is so much pudding in this car
Randomize
