So, how was the dinner
Just like the ex wife, cold, fatty, and expensive.
the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
i woke up wearing her shoes. this night isn't going on my highlight reel
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I want a nosebag of coke after my exam. Like what horses have. Coked up horses. No excuses. I love you.
She fucked me for a ride to the airport. If this is what the rest of college is like, I'm never graduating.
I'm sitting at my desk looking through our payroll system photos to find my next boyfriend. Abuse of power or awesome?
I want to break his glasses with my pelvis.
We lost a condom inside me, I had to fish it out. The next day he gave me a Gone Fishin' bumper sticker. True love at its finest.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just don't understand how we smoked the EXACT same thing and I feel fine but Tim's over here serenading his fifth bowl of fruit loops with Elton John's entire discography.
I couldn't drink enough to fuck the friend, you said challenge accepted and stole some chicks shot.
I'm going to try and loofah my hangover away.
Update: It didn't work
How the fuck can he download so much porn but not know how to find the Skype app?
Drink. Fuck. Waffle House. Repeat.
Just witnessed a man yell "gonna catch a slut!" at himself in the mirror while doing bicep curls at the gym.
I was...perplexed.
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