Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
be a good friend and just tell me i'm not pregnant
i'm using a wine bottle as a spitter. how classy is that.
i refuse to live in a world where loud threesomes in your own apartment are referred to as "rude"
did you yell "are you not entertained?"
I think he offered to cook me dinner or cook me for dinner. Not really sure. Just smiled and nodded.
I'm going to call you, don't answer. Need to practice moaning to your answering machine again
Is it weird to say that getting an std with you was kinda romantic?
Bonding with my year old cousin over the fact that we both shit ourselves. Babysitting like a bosss
All i'm saying is it doesn't matter how drunk you were, at 26 years of age you should always remember to take down you pants before you shit in the toilet
I'm gonna rob all up in that cradle
I think I've been there, but who knows? I drink a lot
But like it was sooo bad! At one point he tried to flip me over and he fell off the bed
I woke up to him watching me sleep and after I told him it was over he asked if we were still on for Vegas next weekend
Get your heels and tits on! I’m not wasting a Brazilian because his fucking kid ate paste or Legos and ruined an afternoon suite sex and room service
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