i wish i could just chop off my fat with a knife..i would rather endure that than work out
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
I need $500 dollars more than I need a night of dignity... I gonna do it.
You should make cookies and when I get home we can have a slow motion hug and eat them
I think Vodka is my favorite. Everything else ties for second.
He just stared me dead in the eye as he continued to beat off. Then said "you were going to catch me sooner or later".
Confirm that you received these messages so that I know you feel the agony of my vagina. There is such a thing as "too many penises".
I got to see a stripper that did magic last night. It was glorious.
the second she challenged me to mario kart drinking game i knew i was in love
At a bar across from the city police station. I PROMISE I will do something great.
Take off your clothes and see if he wants to have sex, that's a good way to find out
We played a 4 hour game of True American then we fucked on the floor for a couple hours Happy 20th to me
it was cool until he whispered 'sounds like you need a good dicking' with a completely serious face and i just lost it
Blacked out and showed everyone my nudes. They toasted to my nudes, and I got an outstanding ovation.
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
Randomize
