May have finally hit rock bottom...bouncer from the strip club informed me I wore the same shirt last night
There was so much of it... it was like he poured a bowl of pudding on my face. It's not bad for your hair is it?
but i got with him after midnight so its technically 2 days
Thanks for holding onto me so I didn't fall in my pee in that parking lot. You're the best boyfriend ever.
How did you get the entire couch up on it's side and into the bathroom?
Was that picture taken before or after I supposedly punched him in the face?
Nothing quite like coming out of an alcohol induced blackout walking down Spruill Avenue carrying a silver briefcase full of IT tools you don't know where they came from. This is my life.
He's hot though. It's not like he JUST got out of prison. That was like months ago
And I also succeeded in getting kicked out of a bar when I was drinking straight from the vodka bottle at our table.
Surely the maintenance men have seen worse than that condom right
if anyone knows where my shirt is please let me know and if you know why I don't have my own shirt please also let me know. also do any of you know why I'm missing a bra wire?
I'm sending midget strippers dressed as bull fighters with mini bottles of 1800 to your house. Already made the call. Jer is going halves on it. Can't be stopped! Won't be stopped!
YOU DESERVE A GUY WITH A NORMAL DICK DONT SETTLE FOR ANYTHING LESS
He just texted me asking for his shirt back and I said I didn't have it and then I ran into him 5 minutes later while wearing the said shirt
there is definitely a hickey on my left nipple.
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