so then we both started to do the walk of shame and she didnt realize we had fucked in her apartment until some lady said hi to her in the elevator
you didnt stop her?
too entertaining
I woke up this morning with gum gluing my ass cheeks together..
I can't decide if I actually want to know or not..
During sex he wiggled his hips and said "I'm turning the ice cream" Deal breaker?
just woke up in the hotel with gummi bears all around me and someone took the tv
we took the tv and as for the gummi bears don't eat them you put em in her vagina
it'll be like the batcave but for manwhores
So when I got her home I realized being a lesbian again isn't like riding a bike...
it was either a cry for help or you were gargling vodka. we didnt care either way.
Any man who has a face like that and a bike, deserves a vagina like yours permanently.
i have a queen bed, a cherrywood bed frame, and gold sheets. how are you saying no to me right now?
Damn you and your marathon penis with its superhuman capabilities
HOW MANY BOYS NOT ONLY APPROVE OF YOUR PLAN TO BECOME POCAHONTAS, BUT WANT TO MAKE SURE YOU DO IT RIGHT? One, the answer is one, and he is the best and if anyone ever tries to steal him I can assure you they will never be heard from again
There's a quesaritto in the oven. Neither of us have been to Taco Bell in 3 weeks.
i mostly like you because you have a nice nose and that's an important trait to pass on to my future children
Nothing warms my heart more than the sight of a naked hockey player in my bed.
Just checked out of walmart with a 30 pack of Budlight and a wiffle bat. Hello, Monday night.
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