the not having weed thing wouldnt be nearly as tragic if it wasnt the one holiday where they launch bright flaming things into the air
isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
Pooping in your heated bathroom to the sound of rain and instrumental guitar might be the greatest experience ever.
elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
I don't know what's worse: going to the liquor store at 9am or knowing that its open at 9am
I'm treating myself to a " uve slept with yet another mr. Wrong" breakfast
Woke up this morning with a junior police officer sticker over my nipple this morning.
I feel like I just gave a blowjob to a freight train.
Tried to dodge fire in poncho. Fell through fence. Blood everywhere.
It's like rock paper scissors. Cold showers and smoking beat hangovers.
If we all have the time, and the weather permits, and you have no plans, we should have another go at Operation Get Our Carless Friends Laid. All the lonely people will be out. We can take our lonely people out too.
Oh, and let me go get some popcorn, watching you make your own decisions should be quite the shitshow.
Literally I can feel my heart beat in my vagina because of how sore I am
she was sitting with her tits completely out.. on the kitchen floor..eating pickles by the handful... rapping mac dre... and then lit up a cig and continued...that drunk
Ya that dick wasn't worth burning a perfectly good pizza.
You live and learn.
Randomize
