For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
I don't understand how he can't hear himself snoring, but he'll wake up to me sneaking m&m's from my junk food stash beside the bed...
Nothing quite says America like barbecue and beer at 9 in the morning.
Just hooked up with a girl I met in line at Taco Bell. I told you leave me to do my own thing and I'll get it in
you want your laptop back?
are you giving me my laptop back, or cashing in on our break up sex?
both.
come over.
I'd say it's a shame and a disservice to the world that we can't stay drunken shitshows to infinity
I am literally the only girl who can black out and wake up pantsless and STILL be 99% sure I didn't get any.
I am not betting on the failure of any friend that is not you.
I have a hunch Mama J got around.
Am I allowed to say that about my own mom?
your body is your temple. do you really want a bunch of dicks in your temple?
You, me, naked, mistletoe, fifth of jack, gallon of lube, condoms, Cheetos, handcuffs, rope, along with no morals, inhibition or judgment. That's all I want for Christmas.
There's glitter all over his bed from my Pink VS panties... I think I might invest in similar styles as a way of marking my territory just incase.
We lost. I'mma go home and drink more and do a face mask and wonder why it is that god put me on this Earth to suffer
Bachelorette party buss just rolled into down town. DTF, "horny hotties inside" and "show us your dicks" written on the windows....this could get interesting.
Crazy homeless man drinking beer out of a vitamin water container on the bus just set me up on a date with the yuppie next to him
Randomize
