dont worry your back hair reminds me of angel wings
is it sad that pink shorts and cowboy hats remind me of getting jizz in the hair?
I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
im too high. i could barely wash my hair, let alone handle a whole shower
not only did i climb through the window at 4 am but here i am 4 hours later for my interview at the mall and i'm staring in the dark pet store barking at puppies
there was a guy who was being paid to stand outside of Abercrombie without a shirt on... normally i would be okay with this but he was 40...
fter the third song from an iPod commercial played I realized how much that frat sucked.
someone just broke into my class and invited everyone to the bar ...now we're filling out a police report. awesome.
His voice is like having sex with hot chocolate and then suddenly you're pregnant.
I'll be there in a few.
I'M COUNTING TO FEW.
Well she described you as a "Sex-Viking", which seemed to be only slightly related to the red beard. So things are looking good!
Did you put Dave Matthews band on the playlist? It's really hard to funnel when "Crash Into Me" kicks in.
I feel as though I look like a mom with a substance abuse problem
I just talked comic books with a cop. We high-fived as he was running my name.
Proud of you.
We discussed the legality of being a vigilante. I won.
He ate me out while I was wearing a canada goose parka and a dress hand crafted by a seamstress from yellowknife. I came while watching the northern lights. Most arctic orgasm ever.
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