Now it won't go down.
You've got a gift.
You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
I'm sorry that you don't think that "Daddy Issues" are a real thing, but I can tell you that some assholes who never went to their daughter's dance recitals are responsible for getting me laid...continuously.
i had a dream that i had so much marijuana that i didn't know what to do with it. i woke up and cried.
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
youre just mad i got the high score on the breathalyzer
All I know is he mentioned whips, leather cuffs, and a riding crop. It's like Halloween, Christmas, and My birthday all in one. a 5 year old couldn't even possibly be this excited.
My vagina supports interfraternal relations
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
I wasn't a groupie because I didn't carry his guitar home
Your "dubstep at ceilis" resulted in a random naked guy busting into my room and peeing all over my bathroom
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
Currently using my kid's computer to charge my vibrator. #thisis30ish
You know the bunny onesie you sent me? Happy Halloween, I just did the hop of shame.
I am so horny. It's like all the stress of finals week has relocated to my vagina.
Randomize
