You know you have a problem when you walk into your bathroom find kettle one in your shower and a note you wrote yourself when drunk that says "panties at jared leto's" on your counter
What?? I'm covered in blood at the hospital, I atleast deserve a pic of someones boobs
Fuck. These are the symptoms I had when I was pregnant. This could be bad.
She's dressed as a slutty Dalmatian. I doubt she has morals.
Pretty much gone. He was in the backseat and kept whispering that his "toes felt like pigtails"
I dare you try and top an Eiffel tower full of Margarita
Sometimes I stop and laugh and think "and these are my actual life choices".
Dude, all I remember was you grabbing random girls, yelling "It's a rap video!" and pouring high-life on them.
Oh god. I finally realized why the coked out Stevie wonder was explaining the concept of movember to the McDonalds clerk. Drunk me didn't process that another month comes after Halloween... It's apparently November.
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
I'm going to smoke the pathetic stems and miscellaneous particles that weren't good enough for all my other bowls because its all I have left. This is my bag's Rudy moment.
I like to think it's an accomplishment that I can relate my life to a T-pain song
I feel like my sexual preferences are just another sign that I am a 75 year old drag queen in a 29 year old woman's body.
How ya feelin' champ?
Like a million bucks that was soaked in alcohol.
he'll eat me out, but god forbid we double dip when sharing salsa
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