I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
my dad just beat the shit out of me cuz i blew my nose on one of my dirty t shirts and he saw it and thought it was cum.
billy ray cyrus is narrating a show on the history channel. my iq cant decide whether to go up or down.
i just unintentionally masturbated to my own facebook picture
Just saw someone buying TWO six packs of O'Doul's. WHY ??
I can't believe you're fucking in the bar bathroom, but everyone else can, and they're really proud.
Just hooked up with a girl I met in line at Taco Bell. I told you leave me to do my own thing and I'll get it in
yeah, she started doing yoga and cocaine....looks good on her.
I've decided I want to blow you wearing a santa hat.
Aren't rabbit ears more seasonally appropriate?
How could I forget your birthday? I have an alarm in my phone to ask you for sex that day.
He got you flowers. How bad can the sex really be?
carb up bitch. we're drinking with football players.
You sat on me. Like I was a toilet. While I was on the toilet. You peed a little.
dude, there is no doorman in your lobby and the front door is locked
oh yeah, sorry he's up here at the party. coming now
I woke up to pee last night, got out of bed and proceeded to stand there because I had no idea where I was. Then, I heard my sexy as fuck personal trainers voice. Well-played blacked out me.
Randomize
