Very drunk. laura says hi. i can't find my pants. i think i'm in philly, but it might be jersey somewhere
last week i woke up at this guys house...this week i woke up at his ex girlfriends
Old men and throwing up are my life now.
so I was thinking like, Rob Pattinson could make so much money whoring himself out dressed as Edward Cullen.
yeah, I mean if he's down to fuck a lot of fat chicks and stare at Tiger Beat posters of himself above the bed...
Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
Do I need to take a photo of my sister's enlarged and disgustingly dark nipples to scare you into protection? DO I?
Why are there chunks of your hair in everyones pocket?
I decided to mark my territory.
next time we make out at a concert please try to refrain from screaming out our hotel room number.. the amount of guys that knocked on our door after you passed out was ridiculous
Wellp yesterday was spent absurdly hungover and today was spent in planned parenthood so I hope that's not an indication of the year to come
Also my face is like def lowkey made of silly putty
Three Decembers later, I'm looking at this fuckin Santa lingerie I bought and just realized my stocking never got stuffed....
You just kept looking down at your tits and screaming "I LOVE YOU TWO!!!"
Jungle juice breakfast? No? Ok.
don’t ask me. i snorted coke off of a pregnancy test box last night. i obviously don’t make the best life choices.
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
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