If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
I think im in love with that girl with the googlie eyes last night. She was looking in my eyes and at my dick at the same time. we are going out again tonight.
for a minute I thought I needed to put on pants to go get a burrito, but then I remembered I'm in college
FACT: the parking lot attendant was yelling "NO SEX HERE! NO SEX" at yall.
I have to stop envisioning penises as dragons.
We call it "Dishes: Hard Mode". Basically whoever is doing dishes gets head but needs to finish the dishes before they cum.
And so far nothing been broken!
No more chicken and waffles served by drag queens at 2 AM. :(
He said he remembers me...standing on a snowy roof, smoking a blunt, yelling "you're pretty fly for a white guy" at him. Sounds about right.
HELP! I GOT DRUNK IN THE LIVING ROOM AND CANT GET UP UPSTAIRS
Let's go buy marshmallows and play chubby bunny until we feel alive again
I jizzed in his mayonnaise and put it back in the fridge. Shouldn't have stolen my weed.
Wait, how many people just saw my dick?
Hey. You got pizza and sex. How much more can you ask for?
They left me at home... I'm a liability
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
Randomize
