i permit you to call me
Im at a strip club, and the dancer just farted into my face. The bad part about that is I could taste the wings I bought her earlier
im guessing your the one that tried to make bacon in the toaster
i crunched every chip from the dorito bag and poured it in the vase. never again will i have to deal with cool ranch fingers.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you wore rainboots all night because you said the forecast called for wine spillage
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
I gotta find new tactics tho. There's just so many tied up dicks one can look at before part of your soul dies.
He would have to make magical things happen in my nether regions to actually make me vote republican.
Crazy fun. I think I got a concussion from a stripper
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know it's going to be a good night when you're barking by 8:20.
so...the lady doing my pedi totally noticed the human bite marks on my calf. Who says marriage ends your sex life? Love u!
I need to have sex. It's becoming like a matter of public safety.
I got sprayed in the face with titty milk and I'm still so traumatized
Safe to say we should stock up on nipple bandaids ladies
Ok, stop saying "youths." You're 23.
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