can you wear a superman outfit if we ever have sex?
the party was called freshmen disorientation. i was just following the theme
I can't make Walk of Shame Wednesdays a recurring theme.
Balls are wasted. Waste are ballsted. Ballsd wasted
all i remember was you yelling "look at my little feet" at everyone on the way home from the bar.
All i know is we had 4 people on a tandum bike, and told the cops we couldnt stop because our momentum was so good.
You lured him into the bathroom with a trail of jello shots, then proceeded to barricade the door with duct tape. You really should have thought that one through..
gymnastic barn sex. fuck i wish i hadn't blacked out
The last thing I remember was riding in a grocery cart with two strangers while a cop pushed us
DO NOT SLAP ANYONE WITH ANY VEGAN MEAT PATTIES
WAIT MOM THIS DOESNT NEED TO BE A FAMILY EVENT OK AARON DOESNT NEED TO BE AROUND FOR NIPPLEGATE 2014
I pretty much just wake up, masturbate at least twice, and go to the beach. #Unemployed. I do look for jobs in between all that tho.
Some guy I'd never met and didn't invite threw the punch bowl at the wall and set the plastic skeleton on fire. I don't think we'll be getting the full deposit back
I found your birth control, it was in your Crown Royal bag.
The party pretty much ended once she shit on the couch
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