I just took the soap out of the bathroom and hid it... this way I could see if she would say anything. you know, to see how clean she was
I may have just googled Muppet Treasure Island drinking game
You sent her a pic of your dick with 'guess what you cant have anymore' written on it with a marker.
do you really not remember him getting up at like 4am with a leaf blower running through the house and telling people to "WAKE THE FUCK UPPP"
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It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
If you're fucking that other dude, I'll take the sloppy seconds. I don't care.
Hey please buy toilet paper today. Plastic grocery bags are starting to hurt now
Remember when I asked you to make sure I didn't go home with anything less than a 6 last night? You're fired
Only my second night back in town and I already have drunk middle aged women doing the robot around me in a circle.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he spent an hour trying to rescue a bug from the sink. turned out to be a sesame seed.
went out last night. woke up with a lisp.
On a side note. I slept with a stuffed giraffe last night. Found it in my bed when I came home and snuggled with it. Drunk me reverted to being 2
I wish I may, I wish I might, get some daddy dick tonight
Just got an email from match.com trying to match me with My ex..I nearly pissed myself laughing
I can see. My condolences to your vagina.
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