Todays outfit involves shorts with embroidered fish. This kids gonna die.
there is no way he can be that small
look on the bright side he'll over comepensate
we need to stop having unprotected sex.
ya i know. we're like the secret life of the american whores.
I'm impressed you managed to decipher 'annslqllpprebBcncnj' into 'I'm drunk at the Vic, come pick me up and do me on the kitchen table'
I guess birthday shots aren't always the answer
Quick question: how do I take a nice picture of my ass? I'm asking you because I figure with an ass like yours you're probably experienced.
You ruined me. I can't stop referring to everything outside as the "no-walls" ever since you showed me that video while I was tripping balls. My speech may be permanently altered for the rest of earth spins
"Do You Wanna Build a Snowman" came on while I was riding his dick. I had to take a moment.
You were passed out in the OutBack Bowl Shrimp costume and when we asked you wtf happened you just said On Wisconsin.
currently working on a look that screams, "I'm dead inside, but still trying to enjoy the ride"
HahahahahaHAHAHAHAHAHAHA MY LIFE IS A CAUTIONARY TALE
Always a gay best friend, never a bridesmaid
Don't forget to make sex 3rd on your calander
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
I'm not gonna lie. I need sex like plants need water right now. I just need the dick.
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