And then I'm going to yell into her vagina and see if it echoes
do you know what's more awkward than a positive pregnancy in a public bathroom?
not a thing
walking in on a stranger's positive pregnancy test in a public bathroom
Would it be inappropriate to do lines in front of the cable guy?
i ran around the party telling everyone that my favorite sexual position was also the only position that made me queef...i kept calling it the "double edged sword"
I just bought a vibrating toothbrush with my parents FSA insurance card because I'm too broke for a vibrator. New.Level.Of.Low.
We are doing handstands and somersaults in the pool. With an inflatable beer pong table and our regular beer pong table. We're ponging by land and by sea
Mcdonalds hasn't even finished serving breakfast yet and u two are getting drunk?
I feel like we should actually go to church one of these days to thank god for saving us from herpes and babies.
does doing it on an automatic sink count as shower sex?
Apparently being drunk on a southwest flight and yelling "TURNUP" during take off is looked down upon in this state.
On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
I lost my favorite bra in his hotel room. Is it bad that that's the only reason I hope he texts me tomorrow?
when u match a guy bc he's from Oregon & he's trying to flirt, shut up i just want to talk about trees
I woke up and found my apartment really clean, appearantly drunk me couldn't tolerate living there anymore and left sober me a lot of insulting post-its...
How can I prove that I give 401k advice and not handjobs?
Randomize
