the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
Somehow I managed to make my Dunkin Donuts uniform look slutty. And I'm not even wearing hoops.
You handed some guy a spoon you found, he yelled SPOON GAME, and then the two of you spent the next 20 minutes throwing spoons all over the kitchen.
French people screaming and throwing stuff out the window. We told the manager and he's pissed and going up there. This is gonna be like cops. Maybe better than cops.
what kind of one night stand wants to walk you home in the morning? whole diff kind of walk of shame.
What the fuck is wrong with your family? Why do you have unfrosted pop tarts.
My Saturday dick is so much more impressive than my Tuesday dick.
I realized I was totally the dude in that hook up. I came first and didn't wanna help him finish. And he had paisley sheets.
First highlight of the semester: campus safety caught me peeing in the dirt parking lot by kappa. Then as they were about to write me up, they recognized me, laughed, and left.
Bro i pulled the fucking willy wonkas gold ticket of ratchets the other night this chick was a real treat god bless her
What guy invites over a booty call, gets all naked and then when the real fun begins and a condom is needed, claims to not have one? And wears socks THE entire time?
My skirt was too short for the church and I brought my flask to the Scrooge play. God bless us, everyone!
Get your ass back to America. We've got a lot of drugs to do.
I just need some of your time and all of your body.
I just saw a girl on the phone crying and eating a sandwich. Thats talent right there.
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