dude do u know what u did last night?
do i wanna know???
you totally walked in on some couple fuckin in their unlocked dorm room asking for directions to ur room...
I saw the video from Saturday. So, how much did I drink for me to think I was a duck and strip my clothes?
i've officially fucked a sailor, a policeman and a biker. I've never noticed my Village People fetish until now...
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
thank you TLC waking up to a water birth on tv really put the cherry on top of my hangover...
My brain is foggy with friends reruns and him licking hummus off my tits.
That's the girl I met who was peeing on the driveway with me. We bonded
sold 4 oz of weed today pantsless. man i love college.
I know this is random but to this day I regret not having sex with you on that atv on the top of that mountain underneath the American flag.
I was ashamed to still be in my green tank this morning, but there's a guy here in full on bright green pants and a green blazer. He looks like the lucky charms guy stretched out at drunker than usual. Now, I fade into the background.
Explain the King Dong next to my face.
You were typing for me while I was hyperventilating into a paper bag on the floor.
DUDE FUCK CALL ME SHE HAS GRANDKIDS
Chili is not acceptable fuck buddy food.
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
Randomize
