I think I just was a dick to Paul Rudd.
Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
He took naked pictures of me and told me if I ever got to the Disney Channel level of fame he would help me out. I think i'm in love
Screw this I'm going to go talk to her. If you hear sirens they're for me.
27 Signs That Someone Will Probably Be Bad At Sex
the ceiling is raining jello shotss
Dude... there's chunks of hair all over the floor, and no one knows how they got there. You guys just made out right?
I don't think he wanted to hear that my most serious relationship was my 1 1/2 year fuck buddy... I think he figured out that's where he's heading
I had to step in when you tried to make it rain baking powder on my sister
Oh god he's like Julia Roberts in pretty woman... And I'm the one who's gotta make a lady out of him.
23 Proposal Horror Stories You Won’t Believe
Welcome to the first annual slutathon and let the men be ever in our favor
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
Just traded a shot of whiskey for a warm PBR on public transit. It's that's sort of night already.
You also spilled beer on my dog and tried to wipe it off with a paper towel but he kept getting away from you.
I just fell down my stairs, guess that's how my sunday is gonna go
And to be fair, I think we all suspect that forbidden sex with an outlaw biker might be worth it.