That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
just shaved my legs at the gas station bathroom before going to the club. is that too ghetto?
Just sold all of my pants in order to buy tonight's whiskey. Goodbye, high functioning alcoholism. Hello, Dad.
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Screw this I'm going to go talk to her. If you hear sirens they're for me.
We were trying to sober you with hotdog buns but you refused put half of it in your bra and said you'd save it for later
Question. Was fucking Laura an entirely regrettable decision?
I've found my spirit animal. I'm a Snapple bottle. If you take my top off I'll tell you a fact about science.
Then years and years after that I will send you a picture of my warped vagina from all the kids that I had.
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I feel as if I need Plan B just being in the same room as them for more than 5 minutes.
You're never the same once you're dry humped on the frat house floor
I took a 19 year old to a strip club and ended up in a three way. Divorced life might be OK.
you ever just feel like an organ is failing?
It must have been good head...he put down the Xbox controller
I'm not saying I love you. I never said I love you. I said that if earth blew up like Krypton you'd be the only person I would like to have inside me when our bodies burn up in a fiery inferno