He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
I'm done trying to be a vegetarian. My vagina smells like hummus.
Just jerked off to Cameron Diaz in "My Sister's Keeper". New low.
I just wanted to let you know I just licked gravy off of my boobs. Just putting that out there.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's like God was speaking to me through a penis.
she's crying while babbling "all i do is win"
Not much, just your average college male Sunday cleaning period blood out of the carpet.
Tell me you're kidding.
Besides scarred, I'm not much of anything right now.
You don't understand she was in the fountain pretending she was diving for treasure. I couldn't possibly ruin her dreams.
I'm sure me singing - rather loudly - "fuck me in the back seat" last night didn't help either.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i think i just encouraged him to glue googly eyes to my boobs
In retrospect i can confidently say that the last two months of our relationship... i was only in it because i didnt wanna lose my list on his netflix account.
Is it bad I have to get shitty ass drunk on a Monday night because I can't adult?
Homeboy just asked me to strip for him. He should not be this horny and allowed to be in Vegas with his kid.
I may have just got motorboated by a male stripper who told me I should be a porn star and not a vet student.
Dude I had my dad cock block me once
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