I never want to see another naked old woman again.
she's about as cool as a sandpaper handjob.
you think it's bad that I have four different guys toothbrushes in my bathroom?
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
apparently you can't crawl through the drive-thru window
i wont go near him until the smell goes away , and he takes the chex mix box off his head.
All she does is lay in bed and watch golden girls and masturbate all day...
It's inspiring.
Just watched a deer get gangbanged in my front yard by 5 bucks. Wtf animal kingdom
...oh my god that's like anal suicide
I'm aware. I'm writing the eulogy for my colon as we speak.
Doing the walk of shame and bringing my dad a newspaper en route. Favourite daughter status confirmed.
I brought a guy home then decided no. Took him back to the bar and said "I'm going to drop you where I found you. Have fun"
They are gonna stay together and get married and have 2 children before he wakes up and realizes that there is more to life than anal
That's why god made go-pro's and tequila
I'm running late...how do you explain period shits to your boss?
i was making a gravity bong in my room and my dad walked in. he helped me finish. i love being home for the holidays.
Randomize
