That's intense
THEY JUST PLAYED KISS FROM A ROSE TONIGHT IS PERFECT
nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
So dude, she and I just got done having the most amazing sex, and then she rolled over and said that "lets make some tacos" and proceeded to the kitchen... naked... I'm buying the ring tomorrow
Even the French judge on the olympics would give that a 10
Never again. I promise. My old gay body can't handle that much adrenaline twice.
I'm sorry I put you in the washing machine. I honestly thought you would fit.
The problem with never associating with your roommate is that you never know if they're dead in their room with the door closed or just gone for the weekend...I sprayed some febreeze just in case.
It was about the point the universe collapsed in on itself and I was a singularity of insanity that I realized I was tripping balls.
Yep. My memoirs will be called "A Slore Worth Mentioning"
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
I gave myself a charlie horse masturbating this morning. I feel like that really set the tone for the day.
what the fuck is wrong with you
Do you want me to go chronologically or alphabetically?
He started planning our future mid-hookup. You tell me how my night was.
Why do I always have at least 8 men with whom I am conducting some sort of poorly planned love experiment?
You like that 95% of the time I masterbate I think bout you?
Just wanna know what I can I do to earn the other 5%
Randomize
