I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
She looked like her face caught fire, and someone put it out with a screwdriver.
it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
I just got three quarters of the way there before I realized I was way too stoned for class so I bought a smoothie and walked home.
Just made everyone at my party download the vuvuzela app for iPhone, the neighbors absolutely HATE us
What is a reasonable amount of condoms to keep in my condom wallet without it being creepy that I have too many?
you strike me as the kind of person who when they spill something on their lap they take off their pants and eat it anyways. right off the crotch seam.
How does she have a hairless cat and a husband it's not fair. Both are hard to come by
By the power invested in me i promise you hot wedding sex at my wedding.
He compared my blow job skills to finding gold treasure in a gold chest, so there's that.
Yo I get this girl alone in my room last night but she bounces cus she thought the full house poster was "weird"
Just let me put on a bra and brush the alcohol out of my hair.
How ironic... opening your legs for closure.
this is a mass text: the cage has been opened. repeat, the cage has been opened. a search party will be organized. you are all sloppy bitches. that is all.
Dad danced on top of the bar with me last night. And has a video of me doing a beer bong.
Randomize
