I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
this girl literally referred to her butthole as her "back pussy"
guys are not supposed to queef...right?
remind me to tell you about the ham sandwich empire im building
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I dont wanna date her. I just wanna be able to run a blacklight over her face and prove ownership.
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
It's not kidnapping if it's romantic
You told me you were allowed to keep eating butter because it had just passed midnight and you were on the next day's daily fat servings
Remember the time we were horrifically hung over, went to mcdonalds, an you merely felt the weight of the mcnuggets box and knew there was an extra?
like it was yesterday
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think Charlie st. Cloud is the saddest thing I can masturbate to.
I think the multiple Sunday morning sirens outside my window are a plot by the cops to get back at me for the shit we pulled last night. Or I should move to a better area.
You fucked him. I baby bird fed him whiskey . I feel like we've bonded.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
Got drunk with him at an Irish pub ended up losing him for twenty minutes when I finally find him his piss drunk singing Irish folk music with a group of Irish guys and a midget
He meets the coolest people when he's drunk
Turns out he's just a recently divorced IT guy. Not a wizard.
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