didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
he said i was chugging vodka in the parking lot, gave my # to a married man, started a food fight, and passed out at the bar. how could he NOT consider that a good first date???
Apparently shes in the bathroom puking but eating a pot roast she found in the fridge at the same time.
I woke up this morning to 7 word documents that all said "remember to be extremely angry at your jerk of a brother." What the hell did you do to me last night?
We had sex on a ferris wheel in canada, our relationship will never be the same
got hammered last night, woke up this morning to 38 texts that varied from "you fucking asshole" to "i can be there in 10 minutes"
he left me a note this morning. it said "thank you for letting me touch you"
I just pulled a piece of cookie out of my bra in the middle of class. I'm forever alone.
No way. Every time you have sex with him you'll end up staring into those eagle eyes and stop mid-orgasm.
I have cobwebs on my vagina for halloween. And bats fly out when I open my legs.
I can't blame him for thinking that then, placing a cone shaped potato chip on the tip of his penis post bj is not a normal act of love
He used Kanye West lyrics to justify what happened and I accepted his logic
He saw one of my bras on the floor and said "damn you could eat soup out of this"
Let's be honest, college orientation is going to be "here's how to drink everclear"
boys just don't understand what they're missing out on.
he's missing out on my boobs looking marvelous this evening.
Randomize