remember facepaint boy? turns out it stains. aaaand i have it all over my face and neck.
his facebook status quotes britney spears so there is always that
you dont have to exercise, you threw up last night!
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
Not going out tonight. And so the 25 day drinking streak ends....
Ladies, we have an appointment at David's Bridal aurora this coming Sunday at 3pm. And an appointment at where ever tequila is served at noon.
Do ex girlfriends even count for summer sexcapades. Seems like the damage had already been done
Victory lap
He calls it "his noble steed" and i plan to ride it.
Well I don't know him that well so I don't think I can give advice. You should make him a cake. Or have sex with him.
In the middle of our bar crawl last night we stopped to pet dogs at a dog park. who would let a drunk person bet play with their dog???
A 5 day bender that ended with refusing to pay my bar tab before I left the city. I offered to send them a selfie so they knew to never let me back in.
That sounds worse than that time you thought out an entire story of how big bird would kill you
Accepting his friend request would be the Facebook equivalent of pity sex.
I apparently asked the bartender for a plastic bag and told her I was gunna puke then grabbed two handles from the bar then put the handles in the plastic bag and left.....
I swear to God...this day is one great big who's who in the land of fucked uppedness.
Randomize
