How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
Yeah. It's a great diet plan tho. Just have sex every time you get hungry.
I wonder when walk of shame thursdays in the rain will finally make me stop drinking.
Like really my mothers day gift is a pic of his dick
I really want to throw this drink in your face but it was 6 dollars that shits expensive
I'm almost positive that you shat in a birdhouse
I just want to be covered in whipped cream and spanked, is that too much to ask?
Sarah is throwing up still and I'm eating salad with my fingers
Like how hard is it to come up to me with chocolate and wine and say "hey, you're beautiful. Wanna marathon Doctor Who in sweatpants?" Hell yes!
The quality of my porn watching experience has significantly declined. Thanks shattered iphone screen
You just get me
I'm the wind beneath your wings, bitch
He was doing dishes, naked. I dropped to my knees and gave him head. Teamwork level- pro..
But unlike the human Walter the plant Walter will someday grow to satisfy my needs
That's just how I roll. I drink, then tell people I'm either not wearing underwear or I'm training to be a stripper.
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