i just puked in front of my entire floor a girl on crutches asked iof i needed help hahaaa fuck ima damn fool
You were so drunk last night you typed www.face.come/cheese.com as if you were logging into facebook.
Don't leave without me in the morning. I keep scaring everyone cause I'm sleeping in the bathtub.
We just found a handle of vodka in our fridge and no one knows how it got there. God I love spring break.
He gave Paula abdoul a run for her crazy
i just realized i put more money and effort into 420 then i did for christmas
I want the one making out with the dumpster. Is that bad?
Just had a guy try to pull the maraca out of my shirt with his teeth... Wtf
Yes I did. Thanks. I was actually an hour and half early. I'm better at public transport than I thought. Guy behind me on the bus is also crying. We compared cry-snot. It was nice in a weird sad way.
i saw way too much penis for that to have been a funeral
Also food confession I ate an entire bag of starburst jelly beans today. and a plan B. All around think I hit all my nutrients
I love you, and I just washed my hair in my work sink with handsoap.
There's nothing like when u really click with a stripper
He's stripped out of his boxers and is dancing and slapping his dick with string cheese...I don't know whether to call for help or take a video.
I got a gay guy to motorboat me. These tits could change the world, I'm telling you.
Randomize
