this coming from the guy that still thinks "pulling out" is a good form of birth control? just walk away
Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
I dont even clean my room anymore .. i drunk proof it for when i come back smashed with a guy
Oh right she's pregnant - that's why all of her statuses have been uber depressing
It smells like ranch
Must be all the white people
I'm currently using two paint brushes as chopsticks to eat lasagna.... college.
Just a heads up, the coffee pot is filled with Jager.
Why is there an appointment in my calandar called "get the fuck to the bus" at 3 am june 19th?
I want him to rain dance my fallopian tubes.
They sent me to the hospital. Apparently, of the many things I said, I looked at the doctor and told him, "Wow... it's like you're a REAL DOCTOR!"
Secondly, that waffle is lost for good. I have no fucking idea where that bitch is
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
It's always great when the guy I get pills from sends me an email that says "I know you will get clean it's going to be hard but I know you can do it"
Thanks for wearing matching bob ross shirts to the bar with me and referring to every guy as a happy little accident
things i am: 1) still drunk 2) still wearing my leopard onesie 3) still gonna make my 9am lecture despite the odds CAN I GET A HIGH FIVE
Randomize
