your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
Are they still out there making out on the couch? How can we get them to leave?
I 'm gonna go stand naked in the kitchen with a knife
I'm drinking in the hospital parking lot.
is it sad that i can masturbate and get my big O just from thinking about a Tiffany engagement ring?
we do all of our sexting over chat on words with friends, so my boyfriend doesn't know about it when he looks at my texts.
All I can tell you is you will need a rain slicker for tonight's festivities. Any clothes underneath would be highly frowned upon as well.
he left his wallet here so lets treat ourselves to a lunch for the lack of penis we both had deal with
only clue right now is the orange grease all on my clothes. debit card denied so I know something weird went down..
i would have thought, that you two being my best friends, one of you would have atleast tried to catch me before i hit the ground after blacking out.
He's laying next to me passed out dressed as a hooters girl
I bet he's a super pretty hooters girl
The strip club incident sums up our friendship pretty well
What happened to my face?
You kneed yourself in the eye during the Harlem Shake.
It was impressive.
we all thought you were asleep. he found you an hour later sitting outside in the snow lighting a bowl, singing the CatDog theme song, and hugging a box a Franzia.
We're doing a team debriefing of Saturday night in group text right now. As 75% of the female presence at that party we saw some shit.
Remember how I was complaining about how no guy has ever gotten me off?
Randomize
