I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
Also, our mothers are placing bets on which of us will get pregnant first.
the more i look through evidence of last night, the less i seem to remember.
So basically i got outta bed and started peeing on the a/c unit..when my roommate tried to stop me i looked at him and said "i got this"
That's cause you yelled across the parking lot you wanted to eat her out
Ok... I'm a little jealous... Grab her pig tails and ride her like a jet ski. Making motor noises is optional.
Uh no. you let me handle it. trust me: I can paint the Mona Lisa in tints of bitch.
apparently I crawled into someone's bed and demanded they call me 'big dog' before shotgunning a beer
Night just started and I've already seen a woman headbutt a brick wall. Unintentionally. Epic to say the least
We had a deepthroating contest with breadsticks at Olive Garden
haha all our friends are at the carnival and I'm on stage dry humping a 40 year old
You should never be more than a quarter of a mile from a working toilet
Preach!
He stopped in the middle of us banging in order to check in for his Southwest flight.
the most terrified I've ever been was seeing Danny Devito squirming on the ground in this underwear, covered in hand sanitizer, completely hairless
So, I think my BF has slept with several of our sorority sisters
Well, now that you know, yes he has. We didn’t say anything because you seemed so happy. He’s a great guy and none of us have any hard feelings, but yeah, we’re all very familiar with his penis and it’s talents
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