Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
not only did i manage to get kicked out of the bar, i also got kicked out of denny's. i didnt even know that was possible.
I feel like if I were on Intervention, I would have to be a season finale.
Crisis Situation. How do you have that "we probably shouldn't make out tonight cause i've got an oral herpes outbreak coming on" conversation on a third date.
HOnestly. That's my one goal for this whole trip. I don't give a shit about souvenirs or sand. I want penis.
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
If you start sounding at all like you're even remotely in love, expect a lecture on the merits of being a single woman with a vibrator.
This is why we're friends.
Next time we include dessert condiments into our sex life we can fuck up my sheets. It's only fair.
Just do let me go home with anyone especially I a guy with a hair sweater
When you finally get laid, I shall make you a trophy out of dildos
He's got the most well kempt beard I've ever seen and I need it between my thighs is basically what I'm saying
But Keith is doing MDMA for New Years and he's 39.
Keith has a beautiful 20 year old girlfriend, a good job and a cute puppy. We can't all be Keith.
But I want to be Keith.
You have to commit to sexting. You can't just quit right after I send you pictures of my asshole.
Seriously, come on.
I feel like there's a picture of my ass on the internet right now.
I hate you.
I quit doing blow for him. If that doesn’t say “I’m in love with you and want to marry you” idk what does
Randomize
