my computer doesn't work...
why?
i puked on it last night
I kissed a girl and did not like it. Now I hate Katy Perry even more.
No it wasn't her, this girl had both hands.
I'm pretty sure you can't just waltz into a walk in clinic and ask them to de-baby you.
He poured all of the vodka into the sweet tea and said that tomorrow it would be called 'surprise drunk.' then we had sex.
If letting him bang me while i'm wearing reindeer antlers and a painted red nose isn't the christmas spirit, I dont know what is
i think i was tempted to text while we were making out. like i remember holding my phone up behind his head and just staring at it.
I'm mentally preparing my vagina for this semester. It's fucking welcome week. I'm going to be talking to her all night.
I just ran into mom and dad day drinking at the bar while I skipped class and was day drinking at the same bar.
I missed rounds this morning...my senior resident hooked me up to and IV and made me stay in the clinic because he said I didn't look presentable enough to walk around the hospital
He put a canoe in the lazy river at the water and started paddling away from security
The laundromat is nothing like In the pornos
My Easter dress smells like alcohol, men, and bad decisions
I don't want the fire department to come out here twice in one weekend because of your god damn vape.
i passed out in front of ihop...for the second night in a row. i think i need to reevaluate my life choices
Randomize
