So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
Situation: He got it in my eye, how long do I let it sting before should start to worry?
This girl just introduced herself as Queefer Sutherland. She's on a roller derby team. What. The. Fuck.
i can recognize that vagina from a mile away
I can't believe you broke a Paula dean wooden spoon over my ass
Road construction signs are deceptively heavy
I just want to know what horrible accidents of evolution allowed that tiny penis to exist
If for no other reason than to cuddle with that puppy, you have to hook up with him again.
This conversation has now reached a level of awkward that even a passerby streaking hobo couldn't break.
Um went out in San Francisco last night and ignored someone hitting on me. So they bit my arm. Lmfao PLEASE TELL ME THIS ISNT THE SINGLE LIFE
How much weight does it take to launch a cat using a trebuchet vs the tension required for a catapult?
That awkward moment when you realize that last night you walked from in n out to petco, bought a mouse for $3, named it mogar, taught it how to skateboard on a techdeck, made it a home out of a trash can, fed it fruity pebbles and cheese, and then forgot where you left it.
I just got a hug from a random kid in my class. he said I was a champ at the bar last night..someone help me.
now whenever i pass that house all i can think about is how i pooped in their yard..
Hey? Just a hypothetical. You ever accidentally kill somebody's cat on purpose? Like you didn't mean to but it had it coming? If you're wondering it tripped me while I was walking down the stairs and I landed on it as I fell.
Randomize
