when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
Of course im so fucked up sarah. I fight away tornadoes.
YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
I'm driving behind a lime green VW that has "Seniors '10!" shoe polished on the rear window. i haven't even seen her yet, but I do have a boner.
For some reason 'start yourself on fire drunk' isn't nearly as funny after last 4th of july..
I'd be a gr8 surrogate. I'm gonna love your fetus
I have the coolest burn here. Everyone is taking my picture. I'm like a celebrity of the burn victims.
No, I am not setting up my roomba to clean up puke.
My arms are sore from holding up pukeahontas for so long
You could breast feed yourself wine!! This shit is genius!
Dude between pissing everywhere and all of those frogs, that bathroom got wrecked.
I'm really having trouble focusing on shark week with this erection
I was driving around a golf cart with a keg in the back before I got caught by the cops. First slow speed chase ever
Denim handjobs are the worst handjobs. I hate all handjobs. Why do people even.
I'M TRYING. TO WATCH. PORN. PLS HAVE UR IMPORTANT DISCUSSIONS ELSEWHERE FUCKERS
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