Texts From Last Night

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  (323): View more from California

  WTF. you left me with no condoms and you ate all my mac and cheese. scumbag.

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  (323): WTF. you left me with no condoms and you ate all my mac and cheese. scumbag. http://tfl.nu/8spr
  Replies (6) Good night (1571) Bad night (2341)
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  (251): View more from Alabama

  i have a reoccuring irrational fear i'm going to walk in on my dad masterbating. Night.

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  (251): i have a reoccuring irrational fear i'm going to walk in on my dad masterbating. Night. http://tfl.nu/skue
  Replies (20) Good night (664) Bad night (3862)
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  (562): View more from California

  about to try to wax my asshole... wish me luck

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  (562): about to try to wax my asshole... wish me luck http://tfl.nu/779f
  Replies (33) Good night (1173) Bad night (7570)
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  (818): View more from California

  he took off his pants and apologized in advance if I thought he was too small.

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  (818): he took off his pants and apologized in advance if I thought he was too small. http://tfl.nu/cj40
  Replies (40) Good night (896) Bad night (10506)
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  (832): View more from Houston, Texas

  I think he'd cut a tree down for me. He's from North Dakota. That's something hot guys do there, right?

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  (832): I think he'd cut a tree down for me. He's from North Dakota. That's something hot guys do there, right? http://tfl.nu/xt5v
  Replies (38) Good night (5306) Bad night (1125)
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  (330): View more from Ohio

  fell asleep with the bong in the pool, weirdest tan line ever

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  (330): fell asleep with the bong in the pool, weirdest tan line ever http://tfl.nu/itin
  Replies (11) Good night (5166) Bad night (1222)
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  (608): View more from Wisconsin

  I wish there was a classy way to show off your boobs.

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  (608): I wish there was a classy way to show off your boobs. http://tfl.nu/6w3y
  Replies (31) Good night (6524) Bad night (1151)
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  (832): View more from Houston, Texas

  How do guys with small dicks who cheat on their girlfriends get girlfriends!?!

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  (832): How do guys with small dicks who cheat on their girlfriends get girlfriends!?! http://tfl.nu/iqkb
  Replies (59) Good night (2043) Bad night (5363)
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  (401): View more from Rhode Island

  We literally played a game called pass the child which consisted of us shitfaced tossing the 5 year old birthday boy at each other

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  (401): We literally played a game called pass the child which consisted of us shitfaced tossing the 5 year old birthday boy at each other http://tfl.nu/z80n
  Replies (14) Good night (1828) Bad night (4372)
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  (+44): View more from United Kingdom

  We were all definitely blackout with drunk goggles on, even though you and Amanda were the only ones dressed up as it.

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  (+44): We were all definitely blackout with drunk goggles on, even though you and Amanda were the only ones dressed up as it. http://tfl.nu/ow31
  Replies (1) Good night (1184) Bad night (750)
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  (250): View more from British Columbia

  Everyone is slow dancing to Aerosmith. I am serenading a slice of pizza.

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  (250): Everyone is slow dancing to Aerosmith. I am serenading a slice of pizza. http://tfl.nu/3z2i
  Replies (9) Good night (2101) Bad night (900)
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  (360): View more from Washington

  thought the power was flickering out but it turns out im just blinking

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  (360): thought the power was flickering out but it turns out im just blinking http://tfl.nu/sj60
  Replies (8) Good night (3564) Bad night (868)
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  (217): View more from Illinois

  my mom was by far the drunkest one there. best impromptu wednesday afternoon party ever

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  (217): my mom was by far the drunkest one there. best impromptu wednesday afternoon party ever http://tfl.nu/bp5q
  Replies (2) Good night (1395) Bad night (523)
• Favorite

  (443): View more from Maryland

  I can't imagine anything that has a removal ass flap as being sexy

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  (443): I can't imagine anything that has a removal ass flap as being sexy http://tfl.nu/5ksv
  Replies (5) Good night (499) Bad night (704)
• Favorite

  (832): View more from Houston, Texas

  Yeah. I don't know. I'm just gonna show up at her place on valentines day with a jock strap, box of chocolates, and rose clenched between my ass cheeks with "be mine" written across my glorious man titties.

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  (832): Yeah. I don't know. I'm just gonna show up at her place on valentines day with a jock strap, box of chocolates, and rose clenched between my ass cheeks with "be mine" written across my glorious man titties. http://tfl.nu/yjtl
  Replies (8) Good night (581) Bad night (755)

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