everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
too bad they don't have a 'people you may be able to do' thing on facebook. it would save me a lot of fucking time.
I had to puke in a pizza box on the drive home. People saw.
I'm gonna have bed sores at the end of this hangover.
Got kicked out of the baseball game with a 4 officer escort. Not bad for a monday night.
I tried exercising today. I ended up masturbating to the Wii fit trainer.
I am going to be fat forever.
I don't know if it was his cologne or his Jesus hair, but he was much more fuckable than last time I saw him.
Now that I think about it, it may have been the 6 pitchers of beer.
You finished the fifth and then hid two dozen eggs around your apartment and declare that you would "quest for Jesus". Have fun questing today.
Yeah that doesn't involve enough booze, count me out
We were at dinner and dad asked me to pass the salt and I suddenly remembered doing body shots when I was blacked out last weekend.
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. It doesn't matter what it's about. Last text was about a homeless dude
I know he's gay. But if he touches my vagina I'm human centipeding his face. Sorry not sorry
She was nothing like her profile said, we had nothing in common, and her picture mustve been like 30 pounds ago. But yeah we hooked up
I’m a lady. I promise I won’t oogle your junk when we go skinny dipping.
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