Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
she starting giving me head in the taxi..the driver told her to stop..she looked up, said "I'm the birthday girl", and kept on doing what she was doing.
Have you ever chased with pilaf before? Because dont.
i remember introducing him to all my posters and making him be extra nice to frank sinatra and bob dylan before he fucked me
I just noticed my teeth are no longer straight. Wondering if anyone had an explanation.
Dude, I fucked her last night with nothing but my bandana on. Like straight Indian chief style.
He wears a hat. All the time. Even during sex. And I'm okay with that.
I just hit the bong during the whole bday song then blew the candles out with my exhale.
I remember trying to cut the power to a house I thought was "too bright to understand the meaning of christmas". Pretty sure I blacked out down the street.
I swear she hasnt shaved since the last time we hooked up 5 months ago
nothing can ever be as bad as the night i blacked out, updated my fb status to i need a pity fuck and then passed out for 13 hours.
You bought champagne and told everyone it was because I'd just found out I was pregnant. How exactly is that being a good wingman?
they adjusted my tv to black and white ... i thought i drank myself to colorblindness
Wait, tell the rest at happy hour. I wanna be able to interrupt you with my loud cackles and stupid questions.
One minute we were playing beer pong, and the next minute I was sprinting to my apartment with a watermelon. wtf happened in between?
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