I feel like my whole life has been one big pre-game for Mexico.
you don't understand, he speaks spanish and is tall. i have to do him.
you're like that jamaican tarat card reading chick... only with herpes
I was passed out in a dog food bowl tor two hours. Just tapped my dinner beer. I love homecoming.
he ate me out like he was chugging a beer.
Don't you dare blame me for walking in one walking in on ur fuck session....u decided to fuck where we hid our booze
Definitely just found that pen in the microwave. What the fuck.
I'm still confused. So he's NOT your cousin by blood, but WAS your cousin, on two separate occasions, by marriage? Still too weird I think...
I'm surprised I didn't lose anything last night. Except maybe my dignity but other than that we gucci.
The crooked penis I maybe could have looked past...but no foreplay? Deal breaker.
And that facial hair. He might as well shave it so it spells "douche" on one cheek and "nozzle" on the other.
I can't sleep. My mind keeps asking "turn down for what?" but it won't accept any of my answers.
Friday is the holy day of drinking. Thou shalt observe the Sabbath. It's in the bible. Look it up bitch.
Like I'm not tryna become president or marry a doctor or some shit here, like one level above garbage is all I'm asking for
His sex game is strong it’s like a warlord’s dick! you know what I mean?
Nope
Randomize
