90% of the problems in your life are directly related to your vagina
I feel like i'm in the derek zoolander school for kids who can't read good.
Sitting next to a retarded hot married man on the plane, I got 6.5 hrs to homewreck this shit.
Correct me if I'm wrong but the photo album titles "cause I've been drankin" and "baby jessica" should not belong to the same person.
well you decided to make everyone "drinks" which was sprite and beer mixed.
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
im drunk. people are steering their children away from me. whatever it is that you called for, I assure you that I don't care. have a good night
Are you alive?
I googled "I don't want to vomit anymore," and "how to rip out your uvula," at 9 am this morning, but I'm still here. Uvula and all.
The door opens out but somehow she managed to kick it in..
It was kicking off big time until you crawled out the bar on your hands and knees. Nobody wanted to mess with that.
so I was eating out this girl who was wearing my pirate hat In an alley behind the bar last night and some girl walks up and takes a picture. apparently we had a crowd of about 10 and it turned her on so she just didn't tell me
I have really important information for you regarding the furry convention this weekend
Last night you referred to my vagina as a gym for your penis
I laid naked in his bed as he brought me an ice cream sandwich so I would say everything worked out great
he high fived his dick after we had sex
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