4 words: hood of his car
Well someone named our apartment "the eiffel tower" on facebook check-in so I think they know..
great! i almost saw a gas station fight, and i believe i became the first person to successfully pee and puke in a bathtub simultaneously
Steve is gonna hang his bear rug on the wall because he doesn't trust us not to have sex on it...
After a certain point, you just want to make it work. Prove to yourself that you're smarter than the vibrator.
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
Bro I am trying to have one night stands nothing more, unless she is baking waffles I can eat out of her butthole I am not interested
Toppless hop-scotch needs to become a competitive sport
He gave me a script of norcos and touched my balls so overall it's been a good day.
Had to drive my booty call home because he had an asthma attack after we had sex .. How was your night?
Oh damn it. Let me get a beer. I can't take anymore bad news. Hold on.
Sorry I yelled at you and called you Amish and puked on your eggs
Freshly fucked must agree with my hair cause I've gotten compliments on it this afternoon
wyd
Laying here debating on if i want a sandwich or an orgasm.
True I am eskimo brothers with every one of my room mates, but it was only two girls. And 9 outta 10 times I was first
Randomize
