she fell down the flight of stairs and was fine until she saw the two broken beer bottles on the ground by her.
thats a woman
honey bunches of taint.
The future queen of Norway was pregnant with a druglord's baby when she met the prince. We still have hope.
Im in search of the perfect penis, it would be unethical for me not to test run them.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I gave him head and we watched Fashion Police. somehow it wasn't awkard.
I just used my glow stick from the dance to find my way in the bathroom to puke. Who wants me on their corporate team
It was one of those you-have-no-other-way-home-and-we-already-made-out-so-I-guess-youre-coming-home-with-me-if-you-promise-to-leave-early kind of deals.
I've lost all respect for marriage since I joined this bachelor party.
I was making out with him, and then his friend randomly took off my pants and started going down on me. My first semi-threesome was a success.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just successfully invited my mom to a drag show. If that doesnt say "im gay" then idk what will.
I'm going to have to have a long talk with god if my soul mate has a prince albert
Right now, there's some ten year old kid getting ready to go outside and play basketball. He will soon find out his basketball hoop was no match for my car.
Swish.
I fucked her ex bc she fucked mine but now we're cool and I'm watching her dog this weekend
I'd call the fact I ended up in my own bed a huge success
In order to get rid of my bladder infections I must give up caffeine, nicotine and tight pants. It's like my pussy is an angry dictator or something
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