there was a party in your bed and you weren't invited... change your sheets
my fraternity brothers just had an intervention for me. i either have a problem or am just on some next-level shit, im gonna go with door number 2
Found out why they call her Halfpipe Jenny-NOT the cool reason we thought
Does he not understand that naked slip and slide needs supervision after dark?!
I feel like my uterus is decaying in my body
I caught them hiding behind a car trying to have sex.
It's pitch dark except for the glow sticks, someone turned the heat up as high as it would go and the bathroom is flooded. Also think I just stepped on someone's face.
I blacked out after running into my soc TA in the beer garden. came to dancing on the speakers at major lazer and making out with said TA.
I just got a call from the front desk apparently one of my feiends was dropped off by a handicap bus passed out in a wheel chair unlv is goig down
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
Jesus Christ I am the crazy cat lady of vibrators
I had a sex with someone last night and I was so drunk. i told him to tell me his whole name so I can say it back to him in a "sexy" way.... Because I forgot it
YOUR TO-DO SEX LIST CANNOT CONSIST ENTIRELY OF MY THREE BEST FRIENDS
and their significant others
AND THEIR SIGNIFICANT OTHERS
Do you think if I explain to her I want to have loud, unprotected sex with her sister she'll understand?
I am cleaning melted cheese out of my hair. This is a new experience for me
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