So are we goin out tonight?
Dude, we woke up in your car in some parking lot last night...
And that was fun, wasn't it?
if this week's events in iraq have taught me anything, it's that when pulling out, always expect a mess...
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
All I know is that we apparently made a drink we named The Single Girl which is rum, vodka, grain alcohol, and sprite and rolled around in the backyard.
He just sent me a picture of me icing a cake with a butcher knife topless.
Great I'll forever be branded as gym slut at the new gym.
pretty sure I called you last night to sing Hebrew to you.
There's an owl outside. I feel like he's hooing directly at me.
I currently look like a drunken mermaid, god I love beach parties.
What's the best day of the week to potentially find out you're pregnant with your ex's baby?
I SWEAR TO ALL THAT IS HOLY I HAVE NEVER WIPED MY GENITALIA ON ANY TYPE OF EMERGENCY RESPONSE VEHICLE!!
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
my near death experience doubled as my sexual awakening
Wakes up in a cold sweat at 3am, 136 unread messages and the preview on the notification is "I JUST GOT TO THE INCEST PART"
Randomize
