hook me up with the drugs dog keep up the good work
I hate seeing commercials about babies when i'm high
Yeah, I don't like babies at all
seriously this is one of those moments where im glad i dont really talk to or know the people i sleep with
Well said.
It was kinda bitchy last night when i brought up my pregnancy scare and you said "shotty playing with it"
I'm cleaning the house. And I can't stop listening to Enrique Iglesias. Am I gay?
I even have the new album if that helps you make a decision.
I mean we havent seen each other since december and then bam its cinco de mayo and were having sex under a life guard tower taking tequila shots between each position. no big deal
I say we get drunk before the exam tomorrow. At least then we have a valid excuse for failing.
We had sex on the beach. I was completely naked except for my sneakers. That's when you know
Note to self...boner negates all verbal agreements ...got it
I just told a bottle to be chill
and meant it
I ask for a dick pic and he sends a picture of Dick Cheney. Who does that?
He sent me a flaccid dick pic from the bathroom at the bar and he said I'm sorry it's not all hard and good looking. Props to him - I did ask for a pic.
Make a note to pack something that won't catch shell casings in your cleavage
He took a shot of vodka and AND ATE ME OUT AS A CHASER. YESSS. I AM IN LOVE.
EMERGENCY SUBJECT CHANGE. SHE DOESN'T KNOW.
Randomize
