Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
She compared sex to doing dishes."You scrub them until they're wet."
A very small part of me wants you to appreciate me for more than just my breasts. But the rest of me is breasts.
We made the pizza boy do Jell-o shots with us. He didn't even deliver to our house, we just called him over from the neighbors
I loved your drunken rendition of "I wanna dance with somebody" that you left on my voicemail last night.
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
You know, having a conversation evolve from attractive men to roommate orgies would be weird with anyone else, but you get me.
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
She pretty much spent NYE measuring dicks, trying to decide which one to take home.
She sent me a pic wearing only my batman cape. She stole my cape dude!
I was basically just fingering myself and thinking about space.
He was cheering for me from the end of the bar as I sloppily ate a Ruben sandwich. It made me feel really special.
.... I'm on a random couch somewhere in Newark wrapped in a Lightning McQueen blanket
When your grandma invites you to a sweet girls' Valentine's dinner with your mom and sister, but you have to decline because you're trying to get two dudes to rail you at once...
I'm sitting on the couch playing the sims, how's ur night going?
I'm sitting on my floor, drinking wine, and listening to bette midlers "wind beneath my wings"
Why are our lives so predictable?
Randomize
