She's a black belt cougar in the 6th degree.
i just threw up in a potted plant at home depot
i don't think my life will be extraordinarily more meaningful if i let him put his tongue in my butthole.
i had to apologize to my friends for being friends with me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i told them to call me paula dean as i was making all 10 for $10 boxes of pizza rolls in the microwave
Do you remember giving me altiods and wishing me good luck on the walk home?
Just start grabbing cocks. It can't go wrong! Just say you thought you knew him and wanted to check.
Luke did at least 8 shots of pure mayonnaise last night. I am not sure if that is better or worse than my 2 cement mixers?
I'M WORRY THAT MY VAGINA WILL NEVER KNOW THE TOUCH OF A MAN AND YOU ARE MAKING A MIXTAPE
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i was the only bi girl at the frat party. i felt like the last cresent roll at thanksgiving
I just wanna suck his dick on my balcony ya know
Everyone should just give me a copy of their keys. I take your dog out and I bring beer.
He just turned down phone sex for hockey and I'm so relieved I'm fucking a straight guy that I'm barely even mad
he kissed both of us goodnight when we dropped him off...I didn't know if I was more offended or impressed
also, my mom just called to make sure the dick tattoo on your arm was fake..
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